Say sorry
by Little Miss Hades
Summary: 30 years later, Thalia goes to the war memorial, where she says sorry to her best friend. Her first crush. Thuke, one-shot. I messed up last time, this is REAL!


**This is just a one-shot, on Thalia and Luke, because I think Rick Riordan didn't mention them enough.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own PJO. I only own Amy, Sydney, Annalise, Liliana, and Cathleen**.

I walk.

The other Hunters just follow me, the ones that were there thirty years ago looking at the memorial signs desperately, looking for their friends, the new ones looking at the ground, unable to say a word.

We were all in mourning. Today was August 18th, thirty years since the second Titan war. Lady Artemis brought us to camp, mainly because the memorials were here, and even the Hunters were honored. She wasn't with us though, she was in the Big House, talking to Chiron.

We were now in the Apollo section. My heart ached. Sydney, a daughter of Apollo and a Hunter of Artemis, had gone missing in action the second night. We never found her.

We reached the sign bearing Sydney's name. It was between Lee Fletcher's, a son of Apollo who died the year before the war, and Micheal Yew's, a camper that I knew briefly when I wasn't a Hunter.

We stopped. Amy, the second lieutenant, walked forward and slowly lay flowers in front of her sign. She was Sydney's tent mate long ago, and knew her best.

"We miss you." She whispered softly, and , wiping a tear, nodded to show that she was done talking.

The Hunters looked at me for directions. We were finished, we had walked to each of the seven Hunters' memorials.

I took a deep breath. I needed to stay calm, even if I knew the worst was coming up next.

"Girls. It's time to split. You can go to your half-sibling's memorial. You can go back to our cabin. Just get to Cabin 8 before dinner. Hunters, split up!" I yelled out the last part. The Hunters nodded, and walked away in various directions.

I was nervous. I admit it. I didn't want this to come. But I know that I have to do it, I'll regret it my whole immortal life if I didn't do this, it was that important to me.

I waved at Annabeth and Percy, both the ripe age of 46. They were married, and had three daughters, eleven year old Annalise who looks like Percy with her long black hair and sea green eyes, but is a miniature Annabeth, intelligent and sprouting out facts here and there, nine year old Liliana, a mixture of her parents with Annabeth's curly blond hair and Percy's sea green eyes, and an adventurous girl, always playing and having fun, and six year old Cathleen, who had short black hair and the gray eyes of Athena and the opposite of Liliana, being very shy, but smart and logical for a six year old, and was also holding her mother's hand. They were all looking at the memorials, laying flowers at each one.

Annabeth gestured for me to join them, but I shook my head. I needed to do this alone.

I slowly walked away from the main field. I approached a smaller one, with only five signs.

I stopped at the memorial at the end of the line. I looked at the sign. Luke Castellan, son of Hermes. "I'm sorry." I whispered. Sorry for not being there for him in the end, sorry that it had to end like that.

Sorry that I had to be idiotic and turn in to a tree, leaving him alone. That changed him, I know, no matter how much Annabeth tries to hide it from me when she talks about those years. I turned him bitter. And that's what killed him.

A tear falls down my cheek and I brush it away quickly. I don't cry. No matter what, I never cry.

"I'm sorry." I repeated, staring at the sign.

I knew. Annabeth told me, when I was brought back. He loved me. I hate myself for never understanding, never noticing his feelings. I thought that to him, I was just a friend, another demigod, a partner in fighting monsters.

I never got to tell him. I wanted to, but I thought that the moment I told him, he would ditch me. I couldn't afford that.

I was crying. My cheeks were wet with tears, and I didn't bother wiping them away. That day on Mount Tam, I thought that he had changed. But deep down the real Luke was there, I saw a glimpse of him.

I hate Hera. The stupid goddess, my step mother, who tried to kill Annabeth. It was her fault, she ruined it for me. If I hadn't been so noble, if I hadn't been in the way… I could have seen Luke.

I wanted to see him the most. Not Annabeth, not Percy. I wanted to see him those last few moments, I wanted to tell him that I was sorry.

You say sorry when you apologize. When you want to express that you were wrong. I never say sorry.

The first time that I wanted to say sorry, I couldn't.

It started to rain. A miracle, being Camp Half-Blood, but I know why. Chiron let it in to show that we are in mourning.

I knew I had only a few minutes before I was soaked. I had to get to my cabin quick.

I lay down flowers, red carnations that I bought at the camp store.

I kneel down. My hand touches the grass, soft and comfortable.

I lie down, next to the his sign, and sigh. I wish that this moment would last forever.

I whisper, facing the sky, cloudy and gray, the raindrops falling.

"I'm sorry Luke."

I hesitate, and add.

"I loved you"

I was sobbing now. I don't care about anything else, I just cry and cry, lying on the grass.

When the weather gets worse, I slowly walk back to Cabin Eight, which I can hear laughter coming from.

I walk in. And when Amy asks why my cheeks are wet, I blame it on the rain.

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